The March 24th seminar, Go & Grow: Meet Your Local Grocers, will feature the grocers and pharmacies of Mountain Brook as well as expert couponing instruction from Holly Syx, a homeschooling BirminghamMom with a family of eight.

The Mountain Brook Chamber has made a concerted effort to encourage residents to shop local, and it shows in the care and connection between the residents and their retail stores. The Chamber wisely points out that dollars spent within the community benefit the residents as they help support their services and the overall quality of life in the area.

Registration is required and there is a fee; materials will be provided. Visit the Chamber's website to learn more.

We BirminghamMoms are lucky to have several options for grooming on a budget. If you don't have a regular stylist, stretch to afford the services of an established stylist, or just can't justify a manicure unless it's really cheap, you should consider the what our nearby beauty schools can provide.  

Essentially you are offering yourself as a human mannequin for the student's practice in return for deeply discounted services. On the down side, you aren't going to be able to develop a long-term client relationship since the student will be moving on once his/her education is complete. However, an instructor is always at hand and actively checking in to oversee the student's work.

Of course a student won't yet have developed the speed and skill of a professional stylist, so you will need to allow for a little extra time. Your services will cost a fraction of what they would elsewhere and, honestly, isn't the salon the only place you get to really dig into an issue of People magazine?

The Aveda Institute (pictured left) just opened in Hoover, and it must certainly be the Taj Mahal of cosmetology schools in Alabama. The interior is every bit as impressive as any day spa and it's full of product displays as in any Aveda retail store. The emphasis on natural ingredients in the products is carried out in the sleek interior as well. This former movie theater offers several light-filled styling galleries that feel like a department store sales floor.

A 30 minute manicure at Aveeda Institue is $12, a haircut & style is $15, and a 30 minute facial s $20.  The Institute is closed on Sundays and Mondays. If you're looking to walk in, Friday and Saturday are not recommended, as these are the busiest days, but earlier in the week your chances are good.

The Xcell Academy, a Paul Mitchell partner school, is also in Hoover just north of I459 on higway 31.

At Xcell, a basic manicure is $8, a haircut & style starts at $10, and a basic facial is $20.    

(One important note is that children must be five years or older for services. For safety reasons, they are not allowed on the floor unless they are receiving services, and they can't wait on you in the lobby. So in other words, this isn't the place to bring the kids unless you're bringing them for their own hair cuts.)  

Virginia College in Homewood has trained many a local stylist and has been offering bargain prices on grooming for years. Perms start at $30, haircuts are $8 and a plain manicure is just $5.  I recently learned that they have monthly specials on top of their already affordable prices. For example, through April 16th, Virginia College's Student Cosmetology Services is offering a "bring a friend" buy one, get one free promotion on services priced at $10 and above. Appointments book quickly and can be made at 205-943-2139.

Although students are not paid, they do gratefully accept tips. Who knows, you may discover an up-and-coming stylist you can follow to his or her next salon.

Looks like visiting a beauty school has gotten more attractive.  

Many of us learned our way around college applications, opening a savings account, and how to behave in particular settings from a slew of mentors including our parents, school counselors, or other adults. Even then, we certainly  had a thing or two left to learn about the real world once we were on our own. 

Imagine if we hadn't had mentors with reliable advice. Navigating on our own would have been much more difficult. The Young Women's Empowerment Conference was created so that promising young women between 14 and 19 could receive instruction on topics like preparing for college, financial awareness, and business etiquette in a one-day program that is of no cost to them.

The event is invitation only so that attendees who are intentional about their goals and objectives are able to get the most from the experience. This year's conference is scheduled for March 27th from 11 a.m. - 3 p.m. at the Birmingham YWCA. Candidates can apply online and the deadline is March 15th.

If you know a girl who would benefit from networking with other teens and receiving valuable advice in preparing for her future, let her know about the conference application. Then be sure to offer your continued insight and support as she enters adulthood.  

The Adventures of Tom Sawyer has been selected as this year's Big Read, a program designed to revitalize the role of literature in our lives. The fun of participating in the Big Read is that it's like being part of one giant book club, with an abundance of downloads and supporting material available and all area libraries providing excellent programming.

You can read about Tom's adventures along with your kids and enjoy the shared experience. Although you were probably required to read the book as a student, read it again now and you'll find whole new meanings that you missed the first time around. 

There are too many events to list, but here's a sample: 

* A Musical Afternoon with Bobby Horton and Mark Twain, Sunday March 14, 2 - 3:30, Alys Stephens Center - the musician who produced and performed music scores for ten Ken Burns films, including the documentary on Mark Twain. Tickets are $10 for adults and $5 for children under 13.

* Family Night on the Lawn Music Special, Tuesday April 13 at 5:30, Emmet O'Neal Library in Mountain Brook. Bring a blanket and enjoy old time games and an "Up the Lazy River" musical presentation.

* Tom Sawyer Day at Cathedral Caverns, Saturday, April 10. Scenes from Disney's movie Tom and Huck were filmed at this cavern in Woodville. Bring a picnic and enjoy the cave, music, stories, and children's activities. (The caverns were closed for years and recently reopened as a state park. The facilities are nicer than you may expect.)

* Alabama Book Festival, Saturday April 17, Old Alabama Town, Montgomery. Over 4,000 people come to meet with and hear from favorite authors. 

* Last Page Event, Saturday, April 24th, 11:30 - 12:30, Linn Park (coinciding with the Magic City Art Connection) - Jim Aycock will present a one-man show about Mark Twain and a fence will be set up nearby for children to paint.

There are too many family-friendly programs for you to miss out on all this ready-made fun. Every library branch will have several events that are bound to offer entertainment that will bring this story to life for you and your kids.

I'd like to commend this flooring store on Oxmoor Road for its sensible approach to curbing maverick husbands.

They've obviously had some issues with men who dared to select home furnishing products on their own. Of course, such a slip-up would have disaster written all over it. How many guys do you know who could distinguish among colors named riverbed, stone, and flat rock? And those are easy compared to selecting from among ballerina pink, pink innocence, and pink blush on the same color card.

This reminds me of the time I sent my husband to the store for a carton of whipping cream and he came back with a tub of Cool Whip.

I would caution the husbands who think they can pick colors without their wives that to do so is in itself poor judgment. For your own protection (and peace), get a note.

It seems that Proctor & Gamble, the marketing behemoth that owns so many of the consumer brands on our shelves, has  launched an ad campaign in France for young girls age 13 - 17 who may have reservations about using tampons. 

They've introduced a singing, talking tampon named "Max le Tampax" who offers advice to young girls first getting their periods. The idea is that the girls may be uncomfortable with this change in their bodies, so they can friend this tampon - apparently a grown male dressed in costume - for credible advice. Oh, and he has a whole group of singing friends.

I wish I were kidding. No, this is not a Saturday Night Live skit.

This has to be the most bizarre concept ever for engaging with an audience. I thought "pledge to your behind" by Cottonelle (not a  P&G brand) was pretty lame, but this is much worse. Remember when every marketing major's dream was to be a brand manager for Proctor & Gamble? The cachet is gone, I'm afraid. I'll be stunned if I learn a woman was behind this ridiculous concept.

I get that Max is for a young crowd and is supposed to be quirky humor. Also, this if France, a country that regarded Jerry Lewis as a comedic auteur. But doesn't this seem a bit disconcerting and freakish to you? Would our daughters ever really accept advice - or even seek entertainment - from a talking tampon?

Moms, talk to your daughters. Make sure they are getting information about their bodies from you and other trusted sources, not a mega brand with a spokesman that is even goofier than some of their male peers.

Note: A good resource is My Little Red Book by Rachel Kauder Nailbuff. It's an anthology of stories from women around the world about their first periods (did anyone prepare you for it?). The proceeds from the book are being donated to charities promoting women's health and education. Take that, Max!

While we BirminghamMoms might be confident preparing our own taxes or consulting with a professional tax preparer, there are many Alabamians who forfeit hard-earned dollars by claiming their tax refund through a check cashing, refund loan, or similar service. As is always the case, it is those who can least afford the fees who often use these services.

What many don’t fully realize is that they’re being charged an outrageous interest rate for what amounts to a cash advance on their return. They receive relatively little benefit, because although they do get a portion of their tax refund right away (what's left after fees and interest), they could file electronically and receive their full amount in only a few short days.

The United Way's Financial Stability Partnership of Alabama is offering free tax preparation by certified tax preparers in locations throughout Alabama. Reminding clients, “You’ve earned it, now keep it,” the FSP aims to educate more citizens about the program in hopes they will realize it’s worth waiting a bit longer to receive their full refund.

Most of us moms are in frequent and regular contact with the sometimes struggling, low-to-moderate income earning citizens of our communities. Consider an average day, when we might converse with our child care worker, volunteer alongside school lunch room employees or custodians, and chat with a familiar food service worker or store clerk. If you know someone who you suspect could benefit from free tax preparation service, why not tell them about the tax preparation service available to them?

All they need to do is dial 2-1-1 or call 1-866-869-4921 to find a local certified tax preparer. They’ll receive instructions on what they need to bring to their appointment. In addition, if they made less than $58,000 in 2009, they may qualify for tax credits for dependent care, earned income, and Making Work Pay, a program specifically designed for those who are in low wage earning categories.

Every day we rely on hard workers whose efforts we may personally value beyond their compensation in the marketplace. Share this free tax preparation information with them so they can keep what they’ve worked so hard to earn.

We're used to being a praised in our hometown favorites, Southern Living and our dearly departed Southern Accents and Cottage Living. We can even empathize with Elle Decor since it recently lost its own sister publication, Metropolitan Home, although it's safe to say we southern women weren't Metropolitan Home's largest demographic anyway (loft living in Birmingham is still regarded as an unproven but promising experiment). 

The article, by Beaty Coleman, outlines recommended dining and shopping destinations and includes the obligatory salute to Vulcan's bare rump. She particularly favors the "bucolic enclave" of Mountain Brook, even chumming with the "Brookies" and admiring their neatly clipped boxwood hedges (note to Beaty: My own husband discourages my riding through some of these areas for fear of yet another landscape project inspiration).

She also gives a shout out to the "over the mountain" suburbs of Homewood, Vestavia and Hoover, so she's clearly gotten an insider's view of the area. Nonetheless, it's fun to see the city shared with a broad national audience, some of which might discount our own proud claims by thinking we probably just don't know any better. 

Side story: Coleman describes the pedestrian-friendly villages of Mountain Brook as being "so accommodating some citizens rarely venture beyond a two-mile radius of home." This reminded me of a guy from Mountain Brook who claimed to have never eaten at a chain like O'Charley's or Chilli's in his life. 

Now, I'm not saying he's missed any good food on that account, but there is something to be said for having the typical American restaurant experience. There is more out there -  good and bad - than a fennel tart (no offense to Chez LuLu).  

Image credit Lena Corwin, Elle Decor 

Seldom are our to-dos self-contained little tasks. Rather, they are loaded with complicating factors.

* Multi-step: Make kid's well visit appointment three weeks out, send teacher note for check out one day in advance, get kid to appointment, get doctor's excuse for the school, do we have updated copy of Blue Form for summer camp? 

* Contingent: Pick up prescription, did nurse call in? If so, confirm ready for pick up at pharmacy. If not, take script to pharmacy and grab band aids while waiting on Rx. You mean I have to refrigerate this medicine? Starting now?  

* Sequenced: Pack uniforms and water bottles, drive-thru dinner on way to practice, child 1 to ball field east, child 2 to karate studio west (does child 2 have mouth guard? does child 1 have rec specs?), back to get child 1, return to studio to get child 2. Is homework done?

We have learned to always think ahead to the next logical step. This is why most moms need a personal MapQuest system that helps avoid doubling back on a route and identify potential efficiencies in what I call the errand circuit.

The notebook never leaves the car. When you're done for the day, discard that page and start fresh tomorrow. If you drop off dry cleaning, flip to the next page and jot a reminder to pick it up. It's an errand that can only be handled in the car so there's no need writing it in a planner that's likely to be left on your desk or tucked in a bag.

Another helpful method is an index card, especially if you're on a mission that will take you in and out of many stores. I keep index cards in my purse so that I can make a list while I'm in a store. If I'm planning a party, I might be in Publix ordering a cake, then remember I need a vinyl tablecloth at the Dollar Store and theme goody bags at Party City. I write each item on an index card, then clip the card into this weeble-type holder when I'm back in the car (find a holder at any office supply store) and your next stop is only a glance away.

Maybe other moms can remember all this in their heads, but my errand brain is at capacity already.

The National Education Association will be celebrating "Read Across America Day" March 2nd, with the work of Dr. Seuss as the featured program. The goal is for every child to be "reading in the company of a caring adult" and there's no reason we BirminghamMoms can't make that happen in our households.

As part of its partnership with NEA, Target is hosting events at its stores from 9 - 11 a.m. on Saturday, February 27th. The event is free and will include Dr. Seuss related activities. You can download fun activities from Target's website as well as the NEA's site.

There's nothing like a Dr. Seuss book to bring a high-and-mighty adult down to his or her kid-like center. Grandparents are particularly effective at these readings, although you don't pretend you don't always strive for a personal best reading One Fish, Two Fish without a flub.  

Note: There is a wonderful mural of Dr. Seuss characters on the back wall of Mellow Mushroom on College Street in Auburn. I was admiring it once and the manager at the time said he had actually met Theodor Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, when he was a child growing up in another state. Apparently Geisel came to read at his school and the manager, then about eight years old, had a broken leg and was sitting in a wheelchair at the back of the room. Geisel noticed him and asked to have him moved closer to the front so he could see better. Of course, he never forgot this show of thougtfulness. Isn't that a lovely story?

When I see a yellow blouse or dress, I always think of the warning a former work colleague received from her grandmother, a decendant of Old Mobile society: "Just remembuh, you've gotta be ray-ully pretty to weah yellah."

I've decided this subtle advice against wearing yellow is well-founded, at least for me, failing the requisite olive complexion or Coppertone tan (all before even considering the danger of appearing under any fluourescent lighting source). But as I watch the Olympics I think of the Mobile matron's dictum in a whole new way, as in:

You've got to be really (pretty/fit/tall/animated) to wear (a giant helmet/unitard/ear flap/beanie cap/Aboriginal ice dancing costume), etc. And Jackie O would not be caught dead in one of the plaid jackets sported by the U.S. snowboarding team, which are worse than any basement man-cave couch.

My hat's off to the Olympic athletes who have overcome injuries, disappointments, disasterous falls, and being forced into fashion victimhood to still take their medals. Gold, silver and bronze flatter anyone, as do the green endorsement checks that follow. 

You don't want your moment on the Wheaties box to be anything less than glorious. Unfortunately, orange isn't everybody's color either...

It's hard for a museum exhibit to compete with the entertainment kids expect nowadays (Universal Studios Orlando will soon unveil Wizarding World, a Harry Potter inspired section of its themepark). Ancient books and woodcut illustrations under glass didn't sustain my kids' attention as I had hoped, but the exhibit was fascinating for this BirminghamMom nontheless.

* Parallels with the Harry Potter stories are outlined along the far end of the exhibit and show how author JK Rowling included themes from Renaissance medicine in her work. You'll recall some have objected to these books because of references to witchcraft.

Looking over the exhibit, you're reminded that modern medicine began with witchcraft, astrology and alchemy as practitioners tried all sorts of remedies in a desperate effort to heal. Not until the development of the scientific method and it's insistence on reliability and replication of results did we drop some of these notions. Even still, I will admit having tried many an old wives' tale to remedy colic in a young baby here in the 21st century.

* Ironically, to not believe in witches was considered heretical back in the day. There were actually manuals on how to identify witches (displayed is Malleus Maleficarum, or "Witch's Hammer", published in 1489). Imagine finding this in the bookseller's self-help section!  This manual even asserts that Satan "endeavors to propgage the unbelief of witches," all the better to keep you on the hunt for them. What does all this have to do with medicine? It seems physicians were brought in as expert witnesses at witch trials, since they were to diagnose whether symptoms were caused by natural or supernatural causes. If the physician declared the symptom caused by supernatural forces, it was likely someone was going to burn at the stake or be thrown in the river with some stones as weights. Talk about medical ethics! Awkward. 

* You may chuckle to learn that magnets were considered magical (how else to explain them back then?) and to see serious references to unicorn horns and dragons among the medical texts on display, but my money says the state-of-the art protocols employed at UAB  today will look just as primitive to our decendants in 400 years.

* Look for first edition books and highlights from pioneers of modern medicine:

William Harvey (discovered circulation of blood and the function of the heart);

Roger Bacon, said to be a pioneer of the scientific experiment;

A first edition of the Principia, Isaac Newton's most famous work. Though Newton is revered today for his mathematical discoveries related to laws of motion and gravity, I was surprised to learn he quietly wrote a great deal on the occult and alchemy, topics which were of interest during this time before scientifically based studies. Much of this writing was later repudiated by scientists, but hey, nobody holds this against him.

* Clearly, some topics have had universal appeal since the dawn of the printed word. One book from 1683 is titled, "The Cure of Old Age and Preservation of Youth, Shewing How to Cure and Keep Off the Accidents of Old Age; and How to Preserve the Youth, Strength and Beauty of Body, and the Senses and All the Faculties of Both Body and Mind."  Ah, but now modern medicine offers plastic surgery, at least for the youth and beauty aspects. As for the "accidents of old age," I suppose we have The Clapper and Depends.

If you're a grown-up Harry Potter fan, and even if you just have an interest in science and civilization, this exhibit is worth your time. There is no admission fee and the most difficult aspect is locating a parking spot, as street level is the best option.  

Check it out at the Alabama Museum of the Health Sciences, 3rd floor of Listerhill Library, 1700 University Boulevard (next to an elevated crosswalk across University).

Interesting note: Look for the exhibit case dealing with mandrakes, a plant mentioned in Harry Potter but better known as part of an interesting little exchange between those madcap sisters in Genesis, Rachel and Leah.

Over lunch a fellow BirminghamMom casually mentioned what a hard time she had finding books that featured African-American characters for her young son. She pointed out that there are many books about famous and accomplished black historical figures or books about black history, but it's much more difficult to identify books that have a little boy or little girl as the main character and who just happens to be black.

I could see her dilemma; I mean, does a book always have to be so deep and fraught with meaning? When you're three years old, you just want a fascinating story. You don't necessarily want every book featuring black characters to be the boyhood story of a courageous African American icon. Nor does race, heritage or ethnicity always need to be central to the story. How about just an ordinary kid doing the usual stuff, like tying shoes or learning to count?

As luck would have it, shortly after that discussion I visited a preschool in West End as a volunteer in an early learning program. My task was simply to read some books to the children. As I sat down among the group of eager young faces, I realized that of the three books provided to me, two featured white families and one was about an elephant attending school in Paris. Surely I could do better than this.

Luckily, my friend offered some suggestions for next time:

Not Norman: A Goldfish Story, written by Kelly Bennett and illustrated by Noah Z. Jones. This book is precious and the perfect book for any parent who has thus far held requests for a puppy, kitten, or hamster at bay. If you've been putting off a furry pet and trying to persuade your kid to be content with a goldfish (the quintessential pre-pet pet), Not Norman is your book. I found my copy at Target.  

The Snowy Day, written and illustrated by Ezra Jack Keats. This is the  classic we all remember from our own childhood days. It's a Caldecott Medal winner and, as my friend pointed out, so appropriate for our unusual snowy weather of late.

Peter's Chair, also by Ezra Jack Keats. Here is the book for adjusting to the arrival of a new sibling. It was first published in 1967. That's over 40 years of guidance on becoming an older brother or sister.

Ten, Nine, Eight, written and illustrated by Molly Bang. This is another Caldecott Medal winner and the perfect countdown for bed book. In researching this book further I found that the editors originally told Bang that she had probably cut her audience in half by having the child be a girl and the family African-American. She reasoned just the opposite, since there was already an abundance of books about white children and families. Happily, she says the book has "sold well to both white and black, and all shades in between."

As an added bonus, all of these books have teacher's guides readily available on the web, some created by educators and some by the publishers.

Now I can't wait to go back to the daycare and share these books. Even better, I'm happy to have discovered some wonderful books for all children. 

Valentine's Day

I hate you so much

Too much love and all that stuff.

I hate you Valentine's Day

OK?

Soon enough Valentine's Day will become fraught with expectations and will likely alternate between heartbreak and euphoria. But for now it is a comfort to know that we aren't yet witnessing the ups and downs of romance, breakups, and petty quarrels.

There will be some great Valentine years and some bad ones. Something tells me this poem will be a manifesto for the bad ones.    

It started a few years ago when I decided that I was not going to allow myself to be a scullery maid for the family. I reached a point where I literally could not keep up and was becoming resentful of the effort.

Like many kids, mine functioned under a pervading myth that houseshold magic accounted for how the clothes were reliably clean, the silverware could be retrieved from the drawer even blindfolded, and the bedsheets were changed regularly. Meanwhile, no one dared ask why mommy had clenched teeth and flew into screaming fits at the slightest provocation.

So it actually wasn't out of a purposeful training plan but of true necessity that I insisted each member of the family have specific household duties. A guidance counselor encouraged us moms to assign the kids responsibilities at home. "Make the children think the home cannot run without them. They need to have a role at home see that they are needed. There is nothing better for developing their self esteem and sense of responsibility." 

Committing to this concept, we developed the Process which has produced our own championship-worthy results. In addition to the usual bedroom cleaning, each child does kitchen or laundry each month. Duties are swapped at the end of each month.

Kitchen duty: Maintains the kitchen so that the family can enjoy meals and snacks in a clean and organized environment. Duties include:

• Loading dishes after meals (each individual will put his or her meal in the diswhasher if there is room)
• Wiping down the dinner table and countertops
• Sweeping the floor
• Putting leftovers in the fridge
• Running the dishwasher, if needed
• Cleaning out the sink

The biggest gauge of success with the kitchen position is keeping the sink clear. If clean dishes aren't unloaded, there is nowhere for dirty dishes to go but into the sink to soak and wait. This makes for a messy work environment for the next meal and makes clean up harder. The best way kids can manage this is to unload the dishwasher each morning or before the dinner prep so there is a "clean slate" and the cook can work. If the dishwasher is unloaded frequently, it's available for the rest of us to load our own plates each night, a natural benefit of keeping this job done.

Laundry Duty: Keeps the laundry moving sequentially through three stations: dirty clothes hamper, laundry room, and bedroom drawers/closets. Duties include:

• Gathering laundry
• Sorting for wash according to colored/pales/whites (I am the only one who has handwashables so I keep these out of the laundry routine)
• Running washer - usually one load started in the morning and one during the evening
• Moving clothes from washer to dryer
• Removing clothes from dryer and hanging/folding and placing into individual's hampers. Each individual puts away his/her own clothes each evening.

Any clothing that isn't in one of the three "stations" is by definition out of place. That's not to say we don't have clothing out of place sometimes - like strewn on the floor - but it's easy to correct quickly. Also, a sibling who needs a clean uniform can be a very effective advocate for keeping the laundry moving. And yes, someone has had to dig into the dirty clothes to re-wear a pair of jeans when there were none clean. But honestly, that happened sometimes when I was doing the laundry, so it is certainly no worse now with the Process. I just don't get blamed.

Instead of trying to play all the positions, I coach the household team. Saban may kiss his Waterford crystal, but I'm toasting with mine.